When people are thinking about joining the Advisori Insiders Pro program, I often hear:
‘I can’t start a business, I don’t have any experience! I don’t have big ideas, I’m not creative enough.’
Or they say things like, ‘I’ll never make $100,000 per year, small businesses are never going to pay higher prices for my services! I’m terrible at selling. Who am I to think I deserve to make that much money? Money doesn’t grow on trees, no one in my family has ever made that much money!’
Here’s the thing — these statements are just beliefs, not truths.
These beliefs are really just stories you’re telling yourself — they come from what you’ve learned from the people around you and the experiences you’ve had throughout your life.
I want you to think about your own beliefs and the stories you’re telling yourself right now. What are you telling yourself that you can’t do or can’t accomplish? What stories are holding you back from reaching your potential and going after what you really want?
Understanding who you truly are and what you need in order to reach your potential will help you bring a lot more peace into your life because you’ll be able to clearly identify who you are, recognize what makes you happy, and feel confident in trusting yourself.
Today, I want to help you let go of these beliefs and stories so you can find the true you and reach your potential. Here’s what you need to know:
Your current reality often dictates your beliefs and your goals
One of the first things we do inside Advisori Insiders Pro is have our members build out their dream day. We ask them, ‘What would your dream day look like? How much money do you want and need to make from your business to make your dream day a reality?’
The answers vary (which they should since we’re all unique people with unique goals), but one of the things I’ve noticed is that the goals we see from our members often reflect their current situations.
For example, if someone joins Advisori Insiders Pro and they’re currently making $30,000 a year at their 9-5, their financial goals are typically a lot less and their dreams are often a lot smaller than someone who’s currently making $75,000 a year.
I think one of the reasons why I was able to hit six-figures in my side hustle is because I was already making about six-figures at my day job when I started my business. I set my sights high from the very beginning.
You need to look at how you’re envisioning your dreams and your goals based on where you’re at right now, and what you’ve accomplished so far — because right now, you’re probably letting your past and your present dictate what’s possible for your future.
You need to own who you are and stop apologizing for your success because your success does not come at the expense of others.
Don’t let anyone else dictate your dreams or your success
A couple of years ago my lease was up on my Honda CRV, so I started shopping for a new car. I test drove a few different vehicles before my husband Sam suggested that we test drive a BMW. I would’ve never even thought about going into a BMW dealership before! I kept thinking, ‘Who am I to drive a luxury car!?’
But he convinced me to go, and it felt…weird. Even walking into the dealership I felt like I didn’t belong there. After we test drove the car I started wondering about what other people would think of me if I got a BMW.
You can probably guess what I did…I got another Honda CRV.
When we were considering the BMW I kept thinking, ‘This is not who I am. I’m not a luxury car person. I’m just going to stick with my little average Honda CRV.’
But guess what happened? This year, I got a BMW X7 and I freaking love it — and I’m not going to apologize for it.
Sometimes you just need to own who you are and stop apologizing for your success because your success does not come at the expense of others. If people are judging you or if you’re worried about them judging you, it’s probably just because they’re jealous of what you have and what you’ve accomplished.
I share this with you because I want you to know that where I am today is not where I’ve always been. I continue to work on myself, every day, every month, and every year.
Identify your negative beliefs
In order to find your true self and unlock your full potential, the first thing I want you to do is to pull out a piece of paper and write down the stories you’re telling yourself.
They might not all come at once, and you’ll probably notice them pop up throughout your daily life when you’re listening to podcasts or when someone else shares their own accomplishments. You may notice that you start telling yourself, ‘Well that’s cool that they did it, but I’m not that special. I can’t do it.’
Again, these are just stories you’re telling yourself.
Think about your own experiences — especially those that you had growing up — was your mom always clipping coupons, or were you always shopping the sales rack? Did you always hear from other people that money doesn’t grow on trees, or that you have to work really hard to make a lot of money? It doesn’t necessarily just have to be about money; it can be about a lot of different things.
Write down the negative stories that you’re currently telling yourself that are holding you back. Keep this list somewhere where you can find it so that when you’re having moments in your life over the next few months, and you catch yourself thinking things, you can write it down and recognize that these are stories and beliefs — not truths.
Most people who are extremely successful and happy are positive people. More often than not, they see the glass as half full, instead of half empty.
Recognize the limitations you’re putting on yourself
The second thing I want you to do is recognize the limitations you’re putting on yourself. Are you telling yourself you’ll never make $100,000 a year? And if so, why? Are you telling yourself that you’re never going to be a published author? Why are you telling yourself that? Again, these are all stories and beliefs, they are not your truths.
After you’ve written down the stories you’re telling yourself, the things that you’ve experienced that have shaped your current beliefs, and you recognize those limitations, I want you to work on being more positive.
This is the switch that you need to make in order to reach your potential. Most people who are extremely successful and happy are positive people. It’s not like they’re never sad or angry, it’s just that more often than not, they see the glass as half full, instead of half empty.
There are two things that you can do to help you start being more positive and have more faith in yourself:
The first thing is to stop listening to and reading so much news. The news is inherently negative. It’s fear-based, so just be conscious of how much negative news you’re consuming on a daily and weekly basis.
The second thing that can really help with this is finding people you can relate to and have accomplished what you want to accomplish. Find people who have gone from where you have been to where you want to go.
When you’re first starting out, it can be challenging to relate to someone who’s making millions of dollars, so find people who you can either connect with or follow that have similar thoughts, feelings, backgrounds, and experiences as you do — and who have accomplished what you want to accomplish so that you can see that it’s possible.
Commit to experiencing new things
Over the next 12 months and beyond, I want you to experience new things. I want you to drive by the big fancy houses that you can never imagine owning, and I want you to picture yourself living there. I want you to test drive a car that you couldn’t imagine being able to afford.
After I got my second Honda CRV, a few summers after that, I went and test drove the Maserati SUV at a dealership in a different state because we don’t have one here in Iowa. As I was test driving it, I could envision myself owning a luxury car.
A lot of times, you get stuck in telling yourself your stories because you’re not experiencing new things. You don’t even know what’s possible because you haven’t experienced it or seen it yet.
So over the next 12 months (I know with COVID there are limitations to things that you can experience, but there’s still a lot of things that you can do to open your eyes to what is possible in the world), start experiencing little moments that can switch a little trigger in your brain to say, ‘hey, maybe I can do this.’
Create a vision video
There are a lot of people who tell you to create a vision board, but I recommend building a vision video.
All you have to do is create a Google slide deck or PowerPoint and on each slide, add images of what your dream day would look like. Think about what you want to experience, where you want to travel, what your family looks like, what you’re doing, your dream car, your dream house, and put that into images.
Watch your slide deck while you’re listening to a song that gets you pumped you up. You know what I’m talking about — that song that makes you feel like you can do anything in the world! Listen to it and watch your slide deck at the same time.
This is going to help you continue to change those stories, those beliefs, and show you that what you want is possible. It’s going to help you stay motivated on the days when you’re talking negatively to yourself.
The true you and what you are able to accomplish is going to evolve as long as you stop telling yourself your old stories and start trying, learning, and experiencing new things.
Do things that will help you make your vision video a reality
Here’s the thing, no one goes from living on the streets to making $100,000 a year in just a few weeks. It takes time. It takes risks, it takes investment, it takes learning — learning how to do the things you need to do in order to make your goals a reality. No one is born having all of the answers.
I didn’t know how to build a successful business five years ago! The true you and what you are able to accomplish is going to evolve as long as you stop telling yourself your old stories and start trying, learning, and experiencing new things.
I hope that in the next year, you can find the true you, you can start telling yourself that you can accomplish your big goals and I hope this post will help you do that!
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