Episode 50. How to Confidently Accept Rejection

Do you hate hearing ‘no’ after you pitch your services to a potential client? Do you just want to curl up in a ball and never have to pitch anything ever again? I get it! Nos are uncomfortable, but they also can’t hold you back from growing and starting a business! If you want to be able to accept a no and confidently move past rejection, then today’s episode is for you!

 

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Rejection is part of running a business. That fear of hearing “No, I don’t want to work with you,” often holds us back.

It holds us back from starting a business because we’re so scared that people will say no.

It also holds us back from growing our business, from going after our dream clients and customers, and from raising our prices.

But the truth is, that fear of rejection, that fear of people saying “No, I don’t want to work with you,” only keeps us stuck in our comfort zones.

That’s why today, I want to help you move past these fears so you can confidently accept rejection when someone says they don’t want to work with you.

 

We hear no, and then we think everything that we do must be wrong.

 

You’re going to hear ‘no’ regardless of what you offer

This topic came up recently on a Successful Solopreneur School coaching call.

One of the biggest things that we work on inside that program is putting together packages and pricing our offers based on what aligns with what you actually want to offer, what you want to create in your life — that income and flexibility — and what is in the highest demand from your clients.

After a lot of our members went through this process, they started hearing more nos.

One of our members said, “I’m so used to hearing yes. I haven’t had someone say no to me in a really long time. When that person I pitched my new packages to said no, it sent me down this spiral of questioning everything that I was doing in my business.”

I think that happens to a lot of us. 

We hear no, and suddenly we think everything we do must be wrong:

  • Should we even be running this business?
  • Should we even be offering these services?
  • Are our prices really justifiable?

But the thing is, is that ‘no’ is part of running a business!

You’re going to continue to hear no, regardless of what you offer — whether it’s one-on-one services or a digital product. Not everyone is going to say yes, and that’s why we have to learn to confidently accept rejection.

So in this episode, I want to share with you four things that you should focus on instead of the nos and how you can change your mindset around rejection.

 

You can’t get a yes without the possibility of a no.

 

#1: Understand that nos are just part of running a business

I’ve had countless people say no to my one-on-one services.

I’ve had thousands — actually, tens of thousands! — of people go through my sales funnel and say no to joining my programs, but that’s just part of business!

Think of it like dating:

You don’t just go on one date and then suddenly find your partner for life, right? You have to date around! You’re never going to find the one if you don’t put yourself out there, and that’s kind of like running a business: you’re never going to find the right clients unless you put yourself out there.

Even if you land clients, they’re not all going to work with you for years, and that’s okay. It’s just part of being a business owner.

As your business evolves — as you evolve in your business — you’re going to go through phases of lots of nos and lots of yeses; I want you to know that it’s just part of the process and remember that you can’t get a yes without the possibility of a no.

 

To get more yeses, to get more sales, you first have to figure out how to deal with the nos.

 

#2: Know that your mindset has a lot to do with how you view rejection

The second thing I want to talk about when it comes to rejection is your mindset. It’s easy to believe that nos are a bad thing, but I actually think nos can be a really good thing!

Now before you roll your eyes, hear me out:

Getting nos from potential clients and customers gives you the opportunity to learn.

It gives you the opportunity to make optimizations and tweak your sales process.

It gives you the opportunity to learn how to overcome objections.

Every potential client or customer will have objections, and hearing those nos allows you to change how you overcome those objections.

To get more yeses, to get more sales, you first have to figure out how to deal with the nos.

Like I said before, you can’t get to a yes without the possibility of a no, and those nos will help you learn how to get more yeses.

If you’re getting yes all the time like our Successful Solopreneur School member who said she hadn’t had someone say no in a long time, that means you’re probably undervaluing what you’re offering.

I recently had a conversation with one of my dearest friends who runs an interior design business, and she had a great perspective on this:

Her business has grown dramatically over the last year — everyone’s at home right now, so what do they want to do? They want to redo their house!

She shared with me that one of the things she offers is simply a paid consultation. She will go into someone’s home or workspace and offer some guidance on how to make improvements. It’s just a simple, paid consultation.

This is usually the first step in working with her. After they go through the paid consultation, she upsells her clients into other offerings, and nearly every single person she gets on the phone with says yes to those upsells. 

She’s so busy now that she recognizes she needs to raise her prices and doesn’t need everyone to say yes to her services.

Amazing, right?!

It goes back to what I mentioned before — if you’re getting yes all the time, then you’re probably undervaluing what you are offering.

Now that being said, if you are 100% happy with what you offer, how much money you’re making, the clients you’re working with, and you’re getting yes all the time, then you’ve probably hit your stride!

But for 99% of us, if you’re getting yes all the time, you’re probably low balling and undervaluing what you are offering.

 

You cannot serve everyone. You are not Walmart. You are not Amazon. You are one person who is out there to make an impact and help people with whatever you offer, but you can’t help everyone — you just can’t.

 

#3: You need to focus on speaking to the people who say yes — not convincing the people who say no

Now the third thing that I want to talk about is whether you’re offering one-on-one services or you’re selling a digital product or coaching program, you should be focusing on speaking to the people who say yes — not convincing the people that say no.

We are celebrating a thousand people going through our Advisori Insiders Pro program, which is just mind-blowing to me. When I started that program two and a half years ago, five people joined — five! And now we’ve gone from five to a thousand members in two and a half years. 

But to get to a thousand yeses, I’ve probably gone through 50,000 nos.

We’ve had so many people who have gone through our sales funnel who have decided that Advisori Insiders Pro is not for them — and that’s okay, and that’s part of our messaging and our sales for that program.

We’re not trying to convince everyone and their mom to join our program.

We’re just trying to get the right people and the people who will thrive in the program to say yes.

When you are selling, you should be serving and talking to your most ideal clients and customers. That’s what you need to do. Not focus on the nos, but focus on the yeses, the people who want to work with you, the people who want to buy from you — you need to talk to and serve them and stop worrying about the people who are saying no!

All of your followers on social media aren’t going to like and comment on every post. Everyone on your email list isn’t going to open every email…but you will those raving fans.

Those are the people you should be talking to. You have to remember that nos make room for yeses because you simply cannot help everyone.

You cannot serve everyone. You are not Walmart. You are not Amazon. You are one person who is out there to make an impact and help people with whatever you offer, but you can’t help everyone — you just can’t.

Those nos that you get are just making room for yeses.

And those yeses are probably full of people who value what you offer.

I often say that the clients I have worked with throughout my business, those who paid the lowest price, were the most needy — where those who have paid the highest price understand that I am an expert in this area and trusted the process.

So again, just because you want to get more yeses doesn’t mean that it’s good for your business or for your mental health.

You don’t want to be working all the time, so it’s okay to have nos because it’s just going to make room for the right customers and clients.

 

#4: You don’t need to change everything in your business just because someone says no

I’ve had to learn this with our courses and programs; some people say no or leave nasty comments on our social media posts; we’ve even had people who have gone through the programs (even though they haven’t given it a chance), send nasty emails about how awful our programs are, and that used to hit me really hard.

But then I would think about all the people our programs have helped, or how much I’ve helped so many small businesses when I was working with one-on-one clients.

Some of them, we didn’t have great results, (and again, that’s just part of business), but some of them I helped do significant things like move to bigger locations, hire people so they didn’t have to work on the weekends — and one of the biggest things I’ve learned is that I can’t change everything in my business just because someone says no or just because someone doesn’t like how I do something.

I try to remember that nos are just a learning experience and are an opportunity for us to tweak things in our sales process or in our programs.

You can’t take ‘no’ personally because a lot of times when someone says no, it’s due to other circumstances.

It’s not a reflection of you.

It’s not a reflection of what you have to offer.

And it definitely doesn’t mean that yes isn’t a possibility in the future.

 

The bottom line

I hope these four things will help you change your mindset around ‘no’ and rejection because it really is just part of the process of starting and growing a business. To get more yeses, you need the nos — and if you’re getting yeses all the time, then you’re staying in your comfort zone…and greatness never comes from comfort.

So go put yourself out there, raise your prices, and confidently accept rejection!

 


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